Edited by Lori Appling in
Baltimore, MD

"Some editors are failed writers,
but so are most writers."
-- T. S. Eliot

TODAY:

• How to Get Published Using a Cereal Box...A Tube of Toothpaste...and the Back of a Coke Can to Improve Your Query Letters, Part 1
• A New Baby…Three Published Articles…and Burger King in Baltimore
• $95,000 in Prizes for Travel Photographer of the Year Competition
• Start Your Own Business
• This Week's Featured Travel Publication: Real Money and Italy
• More Opportunities and Resources for Writers

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It's been a busy week…

*** Henry Joseph Stevens was born at 8:29 p.m. this past Monday to our very own instructor/ travel writer/ friend, Jennifer Stevens in Chicago. Both mom and baby are doing great, and since Henry beat his deadline by a full two weeks, I've commissioned him to help me with a few of mine.

*** R. Dupuis from Japan wrote in to say, "I finished the Passport to Romance [AWAI's written travel writing course: www.thetravelwriterslife.com/sh/tw4 ] a few months ago and have since been published three times in a local magazine in Nagoya, Japan (where I live). My online serial tale, Vin, is also being published with a worldwide audience (it's not travel-writing but I've been able to use what I learned in the course in many different ways). With what I learned in the course my writing has improved tenfold and I'd like to say thank you to you and Ms. Jen Stevens."

*** I'm in Baltimore visiting friends, eating out, and trying desperately to find high-speed Internet access and a quiet place to write. (I found a Wi-Fi connection, by the way, at the airport Burger King before security and rather than search for a quieter place to write a friend suggested I try standing up. He employs a podium in his office but I'm just standing at a bar rather than sitting at a table. So far it seems to be working. You might give it a try.)

But enough about me.

Today's issue is on query letters -- the letters you write to "pitch" your ideas to editors. Query letters are arguably the most important bit of writing related to any article, so I've asked John Forde to give you a few techniques you might use to perfect yours. His advice is below.

I have to warn you though…

The secrets John reveals about writing great query letters here (and in next week's issue) might strike you as…well, a little different.

These are techniques that writing books and writing websites do NOT cover. Secrets, in fact, that don't come from the conventional world of writing at all. But they are secrets that give you an incredible edge most other writers will never enjoy. And since those are the kinds of secrets we like to publish here, I'm including John's advice below.

Take care,

Lori Director, AWAI's Travel Writer Program

P.S. Know a friend or two who'd enjoy the freedom and independence of a writer's life? They, too, can sign up to receive this free e-letter weekly at: http://www.thetravelwriterslife.com/eletter

GET PUBLISHED USING A CEREAL BOX AND A TUBE OF TOOTHPASTE TO IMPROVE YOUR QUERY LETTERS, PART 1: By Freelance Writer and Copywriter John Forde in Paris, France

You're writing a query letter. You’ve slaved over every syllable. It's smart. It's dramatic. It's genius. You drop it in the mail and wait.

Any editor who reads this masterwork, you reason, is going to trip all over himself to get to his checkbook.

But weeks later, nothing has happened.

No phone calls. No emails. No interest. What gives?

Let's face it, Cupcake ...

You didn't get the gig.

But don't feel so bad. First, it's a fact – even many great writers have no idea how to write a good query letter. Second, there's competition. A lot of it.

Says talent agent Marcie Wright, "We get 50 to 100 query letters every week ... and we're not even on the list the Writer's Guild of America mails to writers."

What most writers don't understand, though, is that it's not the good stuff you're up against. It's the junk.

Terrible queries with terrible leads, dead ideas, punctuation mistakes, and peanut-butter smudges – those are the queries that really stand in your way.

How so?

There are so many like this that editors get tired of reading them. So they learn to weed them out. As fast as possible. Even the slightest clue that a query isn't good – and within microseconds, it's fluttering into the trash can. Is there any way to help your letter rise above the muck?

Absolutely.

In fact, it's a simple, subtle formula. And you can find it right now, locked away in your medicine cabinet ... stuffed in your mailbox ... even printed on your tube of toothpaste. It's on the back of every cereal box. It's printed in living color on the inside cover of every magazine. You can even find it on the back of Coke cans.

This formula made Bill Gates a billionaire. It's the secret formula that helped make "Star Wars" a blockbuster success. It is, in fact, the secret to an industry that is the cornerstone of the entire American economy.

I'm talking, of course, about advertising.

Your Query: Just a Sales Letter in Disguise!

Sales copy – the writing that sells products – has a lot to teach query letter writers. Because, whether you realize it or not, a query letter isn't just a letter at all. It's really an advertisement in disguise.

You see, advertising doesn't sell products. It sells ideas.

Ideas about a soap that gets you extra clean ... about a soda that refreshes ... about a show you can't miss on Thursday-night TV. What's different about query letters?

In practice, not much.

Like ads, query letters are also designed to sell ideas. And if they're truly written to sell, you increase your chances of getting published.

It's that simple.

Let's start with the basics ...

[continued below]

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The Secret of the Four-Legged Stool

Remember … we're going to start treating your query letter like an "ad" for your article idea.

At the American Writers & Artists Institute, we teach copywriters that every great ad works like a footstool with four legs.

The first leg is the Core Idea. It needs to be big. It needs to be simple. And it needs to be easy to explain. The second leg is a Big Promise. Without it, there's no incentive for the reader to read on.

The third leg is Credibility. Readers need a reason to trust you.

And fourth, every ad has got to have a powerful Close to the sale.

How does this compare to a query?

It's an almost perfect analogy. Take a look at the first leg below. We'll delve into the other three in future issues:

***Query Leg 1, THE BIG IDEA***

How fast can you sum up the very core of your article idea? Can you do it in 10 words or less? The faster and more succinctly you can sum up the idea at the heart of your query letter, the better.

In publishing, vagueness and uncertainty don't fly.

Prospective editors need to know immediately what you have to offer. Ad copywriters have a powerful technique for finding their core ideas.

How to Find Your Most Powerful Hook

The headline does at least 80% of the selling in a print ad. Which is why clever ad writers devised this headline-writing technique.

But it works for much more than just ad headlines. In fact, you can apply it to anything that needs to persuade.

Like the opening line of your query letter.

Here's how it works: To really grab attention, a powerful opening line that "hooks" should have most, if not all, of the following characteristics.

It must be...

1. Unique 2. Useful 3. Urgent and 4. Ultra-Specific

Actually, three out of these four could be enough. However, any less and your opening line is sure to miss its mark.

Let's see how this works in practice:

Let's imagine you've just been to France. During your trip, you toured the Champagne region.

Now you're back home and you want to write an article for a travel magazine about the many fine but local French champagnes.

How do you begin your pitch to the magazine's editor? Here's one approach:

"Dear Editor,

"I would like to write an article for you about the many champagnes in the champagne region of France..."

Read it again. Where does this opening line go wrong? To start, it doesn't offer anything particularly "unique."

Any editor who plucks this from his inbox would most likely think "seen it, done that, been there before." And into the trash it goes.

Now let's consider another approach. Same topic, different lead line: "Dear Editor,

"On rue de la Verrerie in Paris, you'll find a wine shop that sells one of France's best and rarest champagnes - for just $23 a bottle."

Aha! Can you see the difference?

First, the letter starts right in the middle of the action. Always a momentum building technique. But the real power of this new lead is that it's... well... different.

How likely is it that there's another letter in the editor's inbox that starts the same way? Right. Not very.

So that's "Uniqueness" nailed down. Next test. Is the same opener "Useful?" To an editor, here's what that means. Imagine a reader who travels to Europe. He doesn't want to feel like a tourist. He wants to feel like an insider. Informed. In the know. An original.

This is precisely the kind of information that fulfills that need. Editor's know this. They're on the lookout for it. So bingo... you've just upped your chances of getting the editor to read on.

Next, we ask, is this line "Urgent?"

Not directly. But it's at least implied. A $23 bottle of rare champagne isn't the kind of thing that lasts. That alone is newsworthy. And newsworthy is good.

But I'd like to increase the urgency a bit more. Adding "urgency" creates dramatic tension. And dramatic tension makes editors pay attention.

So let's dig deeper into the story and see what we can find. For this example, I happen to know that the champagne in question is sold at only three Paris wine shops. And that the vineyard produces only 3,000 bottles a year.

Let's see what happens when we add this info to our letter:

"Dear Editor,

"On rue de la Verrerie in Paris, you'll find a wine shop that sells one of France's best and rarest champagnes - for just $23 a bottle.

"I'd like to write an article for your magazine that tells the fascinating story of Frances many local champagnes.

"For instance, only three shops in Paris sell 'La Rose de Jeane.' And only 3,000 bottles are produced each year. And this is just one of many unknown but excellent bargains in the local market..."

It's not perfectly polished, perhaps. But you can see the letter - and the article that will back it up - has already started to take shape.

Suddenly, it's more compelling. The information feels valuable. And it's starting to sound like nothing we - or the editor - have heard before.

Here's the last and most important insight. Pay attention. Because this is part of the "Four U" technique that pulls everything else together.

The most effective way to improve the pulling power of your hook is to make sure it has... are you ready... "Ultra specificity."

In short, details sell.

Not all details, mind you. Like a painter's canvas, if you try to put in TOO many details... you just get a mess. But if you've got details that are relevant... by all means, put them in.

Give a statistic. Describe a taste or a smell. Dab it with color. Name an interview source. Do anything you can to make your reader feel like he's right there, inside the image you hope to present.

Do this, and all the other things - uniqueness, usefulness, and urgency - will almost take care of themselves.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: COMING NEXT WEEK: Now you've got your "Hook" - what comes next? In next week's lesson, let's look at a whole new way to structure query letters. This is a secret architecture. To the naked eye, it looks just like every other query letter... but between the lines, there's a persuasion effect that competing letters just won't have.]

[John Forde works primarily as a copywriter and writes travel on the side. If you're familiar with Michael Masterson's Accelerated Program for Six-Figure Copywriting you will recognize these secrets and you already know about the high income potential of a copywriter. If you're not familiar with the course you can find out more at (http://www.thewriterslife.com/bb/tw4)]

$95,000 IN PRIZES FOR TRAVEL PHOTOGRAPHER OF THE YEAR COMPETITION

You're not a professional photographer? Not to worry. Last year the overall winner of the Travel Photographer of the Year Competition was a former real estate agent turned photographer.

The prizes lined up for this year's winners range from photographic supplies to all-expense-paid safaris and business-class around-the-world tickets.

You can enter as many categories as you like, as many times as you like. Categories include Peoples & Cultures, Essence of Travel, Spirit of Adventure, and Living Planet. (You can see last year's winners in each category online at http://www.tpoty.com.)

To compete for the title of Travel Photographer of the Year 2004, you must enter at least two different portfolio categories. Entry costs from just $7.50 for one portfolio category or up to four entries in the Single Image category.

The last day for submissions is September 17, 2004. Full information and entry forms are available at http://www.tpoty.com or by sending a stamped addressed envelope to PO Box 2716, Maidenhead, Berkshire SL6 7ZN, England.

THIS WEEK'S FEATURED TRAVEL PUBLICATIONS:

* Real Money, an 8-page newsletter that helps people live in harmony with their social values and the environment, covers a wide range of articles including travel pieces. Travel pieces should mesh with Real Money themes and should be written in an upbeat, fast-paced voice. Please send queries to Tracy Fernandez Rysavy at Tracy@coopamerica.org. Visit http://www.realmoney.org/writers.htm for full guidelines.

* Have a love affair with Italy? Then consider writing for "Italy," the magazine for people who love Italy. They look for off-beat articles focusing on houses, crafts, food, and people. You can send your query to f.tankard@libero.it or learn more by visiting http://www.italymag.co.uk/writers.php3.

OPPORTUNITIES AND RESOURCES FOR WRITERS:

• The difference between great success and mediocrity is so often a matter of the small things... just a little extra here... a little more there. If you’re falling short of achieving your most important personal goals, get more details about the Early to Rise Goal Setting Check-up Program at: http://www.agora-inc.com/reports/700SDDGC/W700E132/
• THE AWAI FORUM FOR TRAVEL WRITERS -- You'll find this excellent online resource at: http://www.awaionline.com/forum/. It's a place to get answers to your questions, discuss your story ideas, find readers to review your articles, and stay connected to a community of writers.
• Gain Instant Credibility and Credentials as a Professional Consultant. Join a respected group of successful men and women who regularly earn a doctor's or attorney's income. You can easily increase your current earnings without changing jobs or having an advanced degree...adding $50,000 or $100,000 or more each year to your current salary. Click on the link for more details: http://www.agora-inc.com/reports/ACL/WACLE111/
• Are You Good At Persuading People? Have you ever persuaded a friend to go to your favorite restaurant or see a movie you wanted to see? Persuasive writers are almost impossible for companies to find. If you have this remarkable talent you could be in big demand. Click here to find out more: http://www.thewriterslife.com/bb/tw4
• If you have what it takes to write a powerful "report" that sells vitamins or alternative health therapies you could make very good money in a specialty field that desperately needs you.that will give you as much work as you can handle.and that routinely pays $8,000 and up - with royalties - for each piece you write? Find out more: http://www.thewriterslife.com/health/tw4
• For These Proprietors, Success Means Grossing $1 Million a Year. Last December, Michael Masterson lead a small group of ambitious AWAI students through a pilot program designed to turn them into savvy direct-response entrepreneurs. The goal? To gross $1 million or more a year. It's working. And now the program is open to all AWAI students. Visit: http://www.agora-inc.com/reports/700SCBMO/W700E130 for details.

The Write Way to Travel is a FREE weekly newsletter from the American Writers & Artists Institute, available to AWAI students and friends.

© 2004 American Writers & Artists Institute

To ADVERTISE in The Write Way to Travel or to send comments, news, research, or story ideas, e-mail Lori Appling at lappling@awaionline.com.

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