The Write Way to Travel

Issue #2
Edited by Lori Appling in Bethany Beach, DE
January 30, 2004

I just got back from Vegas where I was with Jen Stevens, John Forde, and Steenie Harvey for our first-ever domestic Travel Writer Workshop.

Last Thursday and Friday we focused on becoming critical readers of travel articles, picking many apart to reveal the different sorts of architecture they're built upon. We did some quick writing assignments to get the juices flowing, and we studied at some length the elements critical to any strong travel article.

On Saturday we spent the first part of the morning in small groups hammering out story ideas. Then Steenie spent most of the day talking about how to land an assignment, how to, as she put it, "bag free stuff," and how to package articles so they sell.

Steenie was missing in action on Friday… I'll let her explain why, below.

Make sure you check out Jen's article first, though.   I've asked her to write a piece about one of the more critical ideas she taught this past weekend -- how to craft a description that makes your writing stand out as both sophisticated and professional.

Have a great weekend!

Lori

P.S. Vegas turned out to be a great location for a conference, and we'll consider it again for next year. In the meantime, we've got a workshop scheduled for May in Paris and another for June in Chicago -- more details to come.

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WHERE TO FIND THE POWER WORDS THAT MAKE YOUR DESCRIPTIONS RICH, SOPHISTACATED, AND PROFESSIONAL

By Jennifer Stevens in Chicago

As a travel writer -- any kind of writer, in fact -- verbs are one of the most powerful tools you have at your disposal. Vivid verbs, that is. Verbs that describe an action or offer a visual image.

I could rattle off a list of habits the best writers employ when they write. But using strong verbs is arguably the most important -- the one thing that can immediately elevate your writing from adequate to superior.

That's because strong verbs help you paint compelling, irresistible pictures for your readers. And they help you to do it without employing so many of those nasty adjectives that strangle your sentences.

Apply these three techniques to every sentence you write, and editors will take notice.

Three Ways to Sniff Out Better Verbs

1.) Banish the verb "to be" (That means:   is, am, are, was, and were.) "To be" is one of the weakest verbs in the English language. For stronger, more descriptive sentences, replace "to be" with verbs that do more. Eliminate "to be," and your writing becomes more vibrant, more interesting, and more persuasive.

Let me illustrate:   The boy was at the back of the room.

Grammatically, there is nothing wrong with that sentence. But replace the "was" with a verb that does more, and all of a sudden your reader sees better the "picture" you mean to paint.

Instead, try: The boy slouched. The boy swayed. The boy snored.

2.) Some verbs, while better than "to be," are nevertheless weak. When you use them, you find you must offer crutches -- other words to help explain what your verb means. Replace these weak verbs with stronger ones.

For example: The man walked with a limp.

Instead, try: The man limped.

For example: The waves beat incessantly against the shore.

Instead, try: The waves pummeled the shore.

For example: Amanda asked personal questions, looking for details about the divorce, the scar on Tom's cheek, my income.

Instead, try: Amanda snooped for details about the divorce, the scar on Tom's cheek, my income.

3.) Newspaper sports pages offer fertile ground for harvesting strong verbs you can use in your own writing. (This suggestion comes from Patricia T. O'Conner in "Words Fail Me.") Makes sense, really. Sports writers describe the same thing again and again, so they're forced to come up with new and better ways to do it. I skimmed a recent Chicago Tribune sports section and scribbled down some verbs that might come in handy:   clarified, tossed, traipse, settled, compensated, lofted

You should do the same. Read the sports pages every so often and take note of the verbs that strike your fancy.

Three Examples to Inspire You

Before you rush off to cast out all the weak verbs in that last article you wrote, take a moment to read the three short passages I've included below.

These sentences are downright inspired. You, too, can write like this. The secret, remember, is in the verbs.

"Unlike the big gun behemoths that slugged it out with Japanese warships during World War II or belched Volkswagen-sized shells during the Korean War, the Navy's newest dreadnought would lurk safely off a hostile shore partly submerged to avoid detection and rain 500 or more precision guided missiles on enemy tanks, advancing troops or other targets." -- New York Times, September 3, 1995, p. Y 11

"Night came on. The music, blaring from competing cassette players, reached distorted levels. Several people started dancing in the aisles, their sinuous arms swirling in the cloud of blue smoke. The ferromozas played matchmaker, pulling the foreigners to their feet and handing them over to dancing girls. One of the Englishmen, giddy with the sensuality of the moment, tumbled mid-merengue into the arms of an olive-eyed Cubana, while the ferromozas cheered and clapped." -- "A Cup of Cuban Coffee," The Best American Travel Writing 2003, p. 25.

"It was, as they say in these parts, something of a 'stout day.' The sun shone in all its glory, but the wind blew fierce, the swells rolled high, and the Osprey was not so much slicing through the waves as roller-coastering over them with considerable splash and spray. Most of the 40 or so passengers, including a man with a fidgety rooster (its legs and beak were bound with cord) and another man with three big wax-board cartons filled with cheep-cheeping baby chicks, were hunkered down in the air-conditioned main cabin, where a goodly number of folks were already drinking Guinness. It was, after all, eight o'clock in the morning." -- "Chasing Chicks… and other true tales of ferry-hopping in the southern Caribbean," Islands, July/August 2003, p.42.

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How an assignment could leave you broke…
(… plus your first lesson in Brit-speak
and advice on how to get published in the UK)

By Steenie Harvey in Las Vegas

I'm supposedly in Las Vegas to speak at AWAI's Travel Writers workshop. Course leader Jen Stevens thinks I've a headache, but she doesn't yet realize I'm a lying toad. Vegas!!! Such a golden opportunity to make extra money is irresistible. Truth is, I've cut Jen's own classes to check out the Barbary Coast's craps tables.

Not that I can play craps. But as this casino offers free gaming lessons, I hope to learn something useful. After all, travel writers need all the financial help they can get.

Incidentally, why is it called craps? Like most Brits, I'm scatologically-minded...anything to do with ''crap'' is an invitation to snigger. (Tip: To give authenticity to an article about that London trip where you got stricken by diarrhea from the mad cow burgers, you could talk about ''sitting on the crapper''. However, the word 'crapper' is now actually a bit old-fashioned. In Britain, the favorite slang term for the toilet is 'the bog'.)

Anyway, at 10.30 am, floor manager Phil Luchetta proceeds to initiate me and 15 other half-wits into the mysteries of crapping. Unlike the crap that Brits are familiar with, it all sounds terribly complicated. The first thing you do is place a bet on something called 'the pass line'.   Phil explains about the first roll of the dice and 'the point', but I don't quite understand what a 'Come Bet' and a 'Don't Come Bet' is...

But no matter. I've now got a vague idea of this craps stuff. I take myself to a gaming table – and promptly lose $5.

Maybe better luck awaits at the Venetian – they have free blackjack lessons. On the way, some dubious-looking character thrusts a card into my hand. Excuse me! Do I really look in need of a ''busty brunette's'' company? And why isn't he handing cards to any other women – is it something to do with these herringbone tweed trousers I bought for $20 in a sale?

In the Venetian's casino, nobody else is seeking blackjack tuition. A pit boss orders a guy named Mike Graves to give me a one-on-one lesson. Exclusivity is always very gratifying! And compared to craps, blackjack seems simple. If the dealer turns up a six, go for it. If a seven shows, hang fire.

Now for some action. But to my horror, the minimum bet on the Venetian's blackjack tables is $15. Protest surges through my penny-pinching English blood. If push came to shove, I could feed my family for a week on $15. (Tip for writers starving in garrets: Go to the butcher and tell them you want bones for your dog...these giveaway bones make a great broth.)

Over the road, at Treasure Island, minimum bet is $10. Blame it on too many mad cow burgers, but I decide to risk next week's grocery budget. Changing $50 into gambling chips at Rhona's table, I stalwartly ignore the cold sweat pooling under my oxters. (Another interesting English word for you – oxters means armpits.)

But after a mere five minutes, I call it quits. The prospect of bone broth for the next three weeks is too ghastly to contemplate. I'm thankful to be back where I was before hitting the Barbary Coast...blackjack profit stands at $5.

This week, my first piece of advice is to spurn all crappy herringbone tweed trousers, no matter how cheap. Not only do they scratch, they're distinctly unfeminine – that's presuming you wish to appear feminine, of course. Plus they make your rear look the size of Belgium.

The second pearl of wisdom is this: don't underestimate the British and European publications as potential outlets to sell your work.   These two guides include a listing of writer's guidelines and contact info:

Writers' and Artists' Yearbook 2004:   http://tinyurl.com/3guvk

The "Guardian" Media Directory 2004: http://tinyurl.com/yvnkp

And unlike most U.S. newspapers, international newspapers often work with novice writers and even pay a little more than their American counterparts.   You might start with these:

The Times: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/section/0,,71,00.html

The Telegraph: http://tinyurl.com/yrlkv  

The Independent: http://travel.independent.co.uk/

The Observer: http://observer.guardian.co.uk/travel/